People died because my brother had given up on life and when he got tired of hacking people to pieces, he blew himself up.
How do I apologise for that?
How am I supposed to apologise for something like that?
Something I could never do, never in my darkest moments.
Something I had no part in, that I had no idea was going to happen, that I am still struggling to get my head round.
Do you understand?
My baby brother, who used to sleep in my bed when he was scared.
My brother, who I watched grow up.
My brother, who I thought would outlive me.
He’s just done.
And he took as many people as he could with him.
And I don’t know why.
I will never really know why.
And I have to live with that.
That’s suffering enough.
That’s pain enough.