I was nervous. I typed my password into my computer. Wrong, apparently, and a few too many times because I got locked out.
I turned her, breathing out as if the computer was the one that had fucked up, ready to make a speech about ‘bloody technology’ even though the colour had drained from my face and I still for the life of me couldn’t remember my damn password. But she didn’t seem to notice. She had her own speech prepared and the error message wasn’t going to phase her.
‘I’ve come into some property-‘ She soldiered on.
‘If you could give me a minute-‘
‘No, you should hear this first.’
She pulled one of her rings off her index finger and started playing with it.
‘I just need a little help clearing it out.’
I didn’t know what to do while I waited, so I humored her. Or more, she was talking and there was no way I could cut her off. Or more still, she wanted to talk and I couldn’t help but listen.
‘I don’t have a lot of time.’
‘Is it big?’ I found myself asking.
‘More winding.’ She replied.
‘What is it? A house?’
‘Something like that.’
‘What’s in it?’
‘And it’s yours?’
For a second a smirk took over her face. It was playful and also sneering. The first of many images that would come to plague our relationship came into my mind. I could see, clear as day, the two of us in a dark room. I could hear our deep slow breaths. Mine getting more and more desperate as she put her hands around my throat and squeezed.
‘It will be, if I can get the money.’
She put the ring back on and straightened up. As if she had been where I had just been, in the place in my head, and now she was gathering herself, pulling herself back from a very tense and precarious edge.
‘Do you think I can get it?’
If it was up to me she could have all of it. My mind, my body, my blood. My life.
‘How much do you need?’
‘A grand more.’ She said. Like she was asking for the world.
‘Let’s see’ I said, like a man in a position to give it to her.